Men that are full of issues shit
There are men out there that are full of shit. The problem is that to an untrained eye it may not always be that apparent initially. The good news is that since shit has a tendency to float to the surface, it will eventually show. Or will freaking stink. Whichever you hate more.
How do you know you are dating a man that is full of shit?
It is not like they are going to come out of the dark gloomy woods and say: “Hey, I am full of crap. Will you sleep with me?”
Instead they deliver this (with a rose in their hand): “You should trust me because I am a nice gentleman. I like romantic walks on the beach and watch sunsets”
Heard that before, didn’t you? Yeah… me too.
Another thing to keep in mind is that some of these men may not even know how bad they are. As they say, we cannot smell our own thing.
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Men that are full of issues are bad for dating and relationships. The problem is that these issues spill over into relationships and make things unnecessarily complicated. On top of that some of us, who are unable to see things for what they are, take blame for it. Now, that’s unhealthy!
In case you are involved with someone like this, do not, and let me repeat one more time, absolutely DO NOT blame yourself for the discomfort and misery that is currently present in your relationship. The only thing you could blame yourself for here is staying in such a relationship longer than you should.
Examples of men that are full of shit. With these men the writing is on the wall!
~ When they flirt explicitly and then back off when you flirt back. They act like they were born yesterday and what they said to you last week never happened.
~ When they text non- stop, but never have time to meet. This one is my ‘favorite’. It drives me nuts big time! Many women get hooked on it and all I can say is - stop playing fantasy games and get real! Do you want to have a boyfriend? Then why waste time on the loser who won’t meet? Omg.
~ When there is no progress in the relationship. What was happening 2 years ago still stands today. Things are pretty stale and they seem very content about it. The paramount word here – content. Notice how they are just fine with dating you forever without taking the next steps. Let your needs be known or get out!
~ Addicted to something. People with issues need to work on their issues. Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do to change such people. They have to be willing to change themselves. Many relationships fall apart because of destructive addictions.
If it is possible and if you have a choice - do not get involved with people with addictions. There will be lonely nights and days while they’re enjoying their high. There will be empty promises to quit, promises to start over, multiple relapses, anything and everything under the moon to keep you hooked.
~ Workaholics and always busy men. Look, the very beginning of your dating relationship is the hallmark of what their best availability is. This is because people are their best in the beginning. Later on, when things get a bit familiar their availability will get worse, not better. These men assume they can have the best of both worlds. Yeah, right…
Do not expect to spend more time together later on than you did in the beginning. Not the case with workaholics. They get worse over time, not better. The budding relationship will never turn into a full fledged blooming relationship. It will wilt like a tiny, deprived of water starved plant. Some things are just never meant to grow up, develop, and mature.
Some more examples of men that are full of you know what: commitment-phobics, disappearing-reappearing types, married but dating, chronically unemployed, habitual liers, physically and verbally abusive.
The point is that these are the men that are impossible to have a healthy relationship with. Proceed on your own risk!
Nothing is guaranteed with these types, however many of us stay with them because of what they say to us. We love beautiful words and gestures, even if they are just occasional.
An occasional bouquet of flowers, ‘I Love You’ texts, occasional but steady attention is all some of us need to continue with these men. We then paint the whole relationship in all shades of pink color, fill in between the blanks, create a pile of assumptions, and believe that everything is actually OK.
“Hey, it is not that bad. No relationship is perfect. Maybe I am just being too picky or idealistic”
Talking to girlfriends and sisters about their bad relationships only confirms our belief.
The problem is that there are flaws and there are deal-breakers.
Flaws are some minor personality ‘defects’ one can adjust to to make a relationship work. We are all different and of course no one is perfect. Even the most loving and compatible couples go through an adjustment period. It is normal and it is OK!
Deal-breakers, on the other hand, are things that one should not attempt to adjust to. A deal-breaker is something that either stifles growth of a relationship or makes it impossible to work no matter how hard we try.
If the man you are with makes it hard to impossible to stay in a relationship, then he is full of shit and you need to find a way to get out. The best case scenario - you are massively incompatible.
Simply admit that it is not a relationship, and definitely not the kind of a relationship you want. It is rather stubbornness on your end with futile attempts to make things work no matter what.
See the things for what they are and for Goodness sake please do no sink into a self-pity swamp “He does not see me as someone special. If I meant something to him he would have changed his stupid life style for me. Am I not worthy? Am I not pretty enough? What else can I do to make this disastrous relationship work? Is there a future? Am I making him do these things? Is it my fault? What ELSE can I do to change things between us?? Will this bad period ever end? What am I doing wrong?”
Self-sacrificing, being understanding and kind never work. They will take all they can, suck you dry big time and the minute your patience runs out and you start complaining will move on to somebody else. No one likes grumpy, unhappy women complaining about everything or pointing at their own shit, you know. They are full of you know what, perfectly aware of it and yet won’t move a finger to change things to make you happy. It should tell you something.
MEN THAT ARE FULL OF SHIT ARE HOPELESS CASES. There is no happy future with these men. It is always about them and never about you. Make it about YOU this time and leave that man with his own stinking shit behind. You deserve better!
P.S. If you feel like you need to talk to someone because your situation is too unique and most of the stuff you read on the internet is too generic and not helpful, then I would personally like to recommend you this super affordable online counseling service. You will not be disappointed.
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