He lost interest and left? Could YOU be the reason?
So, he lost interest and left? Could you be the reason? And if so, how would you know such a thing for sure.
Well, ladies, when it comes to men and their behavior, there is no way of knowing everything for sure. The fact is, quite often, they do not even know it for sure themselves!
All jokes aside, let's take a look at something we, as females, rarely think about that most males have to go through every day – the frequency of rejections and emotional consequences of this.
Did you know that most males are insecure? They are insecure about their height, earnings, penis size, everything related to sex, looks, career and many other, sometimes quite trivial things.
We can always tell what they are insecure about by the amount of lies they oh so like to feed us with.
That something can be different for each man.
Example: A financially insecure man (most of them are!) will lie or exaggerate his financial situation. He will be prone to showing off and making comments to impress.
A truly wealthy man is never explicit about his assets.
Should you mention your passion for fine dining and lavish vacations, speak badly about losers and poor achievers he may never want to see you again. Why? Because he knows that once he is ‘discovered’ he will be dumped. How is he supposed to know that you ‘just’ said that, but did not ‘really’ mean it?
In some instances, they keep quiet, but watch your reactions.
Here is the example to demonstrate what I mean: let’s say you have never met (yet) and during your phone conversation you casually made fun of bald men. If he is a balding man and super insecure about it, then there is a high chance he will never ask you for a date and disappear for good.
There are plenty of women out there who don’t mind dating balding or bald men without making fun of them. See my point?
Men do not want to be “discovered” and dumped as a result. So, YOU in this case, can make or break the whole deal by exhibiting the willingness or unwillingness to accept them for who they are.
How it all works.
It all starts from a blank canvas. These are so easy to paint. One stroke here, a couple strokes there and here we are – a dream come true piece of art. Ready for sale! Any takers? It is oh so beautiful and seems so perfect.
But IS IT??
If I were to paint a true picture of you, would it be perfect? I do not think so. No one is freaking perfect. Come on, ladies. What are we, kindergarten kids believing in clowns and miracles?
The moment when a curtain is pulled away and the truth is revealed is usually the moment when we choose to ‘still’ like them or like them less. Our further behavior, emotional reaction to the discovery, attitude, and comments will greatly influence the thought process of a guy, and therefore his decision to continue OR disappear on you.
Think about it – you just got exposed to something that he is very vulnerable and insecure about. Your reaction and acceptance level will tell him what to do next.
Who the hell wants to be embarrassed, ridiculed, criticized, and called names for lying, hiding, and pretending? And after all that dumped like an old bag of useless door knobs?
Your ‘meh’ reaction is all they will need to lose interest and leave forever. They already know it won’t work.
If you really like the man you are currently dating, it would be up to you to discover his skeletons first and then be compassionate and understanding about it.
It would be up to you to be sensitive about the issue and not blurt out something that makes him run for the hills. Most men are selfish and do not put up with crap much.
Just like us, women, men also suffer from emotional traumas, have emotional baggage and see therapists to treat PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder).
The last thing on Earth they want is a woman who laughs at them and makes humiliating, insensitive comments.
We are so obsessed with our own looks, what his text messages mean and how much he paid for dinner, that we totally forget what it is like to be on the other side of the deal.
They may worry that you will never respond to sms, may say “No” to the next date and that will be it. They may worry about not being attractive enough for you, not being successful enough for you or being a lousy lay.
They could be worried and insecure about many other things, the things you have no idea exist and the things you will never know.
Do not unknowingly turn away from a good man. Do not react impulsively to an uncomfortable truth. Take your time to think it over. Remember, you can always leave. Leaving is easy! Men need acceptance too.
P.S. If you feel like you need to talk to someone because your situation is too unique and most of the stuff you read on the internet is too generic and not helpful, then I would personally like to recommend you this affordable online counseling service. You will not be disappointed.
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