When he comes back AGAIN
Did he just come back AGAIN?
Should something like this happen you better have your finger on the ‘flush’ button ready to push to flush him back immediately. Let him go back to where he came from (and we do not want to go into stinky details here, do we ladies??)
When your ex comes back – once AGAIN – it is your golden opportunity to show him his place. You see, he is so delusional, he thinks that he can weasel in (and out) of your life as if it was a revolving door. He is certainly convinced that he is entitled to having it all without your consent. Don’t you feel insulted by just thinking about it??
Do NOT be flattered when he comes back. These kind of men do it to all of their exes. It is a learned behavior and it is a pattern.
Are you thinking about giving him a 2nd-3rd-… 10-th chance? Depending on your answer, here is what will happen with a 101% degree of reliability:
Yes --> Taking him back AGAIN will bring old pain back, will reopen semi-healed wounds, and sabotage your recovery process. You will immediately become emotionally unavailable to other people which means having zero opportunity for a better relationship with someone else.
No --> Not taking him back means that you know now that you can live without him. You also hope that you can be happy with someone else because if you were able to experience ‘some’ happiness with a jerk, then you can surely be doubly happy with a non-jerk!
Giving or not giving a second chance is a very common issue for many women. Giving them yet another chance is a way of saying “I know he is wrong for me, but it is so much easier to try again than to find someone else”. To these women I would like to say – as long as you keep giving them another chance (and being stuck on them like forever) you will never find someone else.
By taking them back you are saying ‘yes’ to a broken relationship, ‘yes’ to your old pain, ‘yes’ to mistreatment and a big fat NO to your chance of meeting someone new!
See what I am saying here?? It drives me crazy when women do this. Please, please stop doing it to yourself. Please!
Their knocking on the door of your broken heart is actually not about you and is not a sign of love. It is 100% about them.
Ever wondered what makes them want to come back months, years, or even decades later? It is not because they are happily married or are in a happy committed relationship, it is because they are a sore loser. Most of these guys have a rocky history with women or in other words - they either do not know how to treat a woman and/or do not know what it takes to be successful with them. These men are masters of head games and they do not learn from their past. They play right and left their entire life until one day, when no one wants them. Duh! Didn’t we see it coming??
‘I do not get it, we broke up when I was in a high school... it has been almost 15 years and now he suddenly wants another chance?? What is he thinking?’
‘I know I keep making the same mistake and every time I do I say to myself OK, this time will be the last. I had so many of these ‘last times’, will it ever stop? Why does he keep coming back if the only thing he wants is to run away?’
‘I was flustered to get a call from my ex of 7 years… it did not feel right’.
They are not coming back because you are special (you were in a relationship with them already and know pretty darn well how un-special you felt), they are back knocking on your door because they are lonely, rejected by the rest of their exes and now think you will take them back.
They think that if a gazillion years ago you were head over heels in love and played a door mat, then you are still the same naïve little girl who is still dying to see them. They may even remember how you chased after they left or how badly you begged them to stay. They remember your love, they KNOW you loved them, and now, xx months or years later they think you still love them and will still take them back. It is like they are this worn out with a bunch of holes old-fashioned and faded but still precious purse you are supposed to hold on to for the rest of your life because of its sentimental value. Really??
They are the same person and them being a loser in terms of relationships with other women only proves what a loser they are - it never worked out with any of them! It means that if you were to take them back your relationship with them would not work out either. It will be the same! Same old same old. You cannot have a new and better relationship with your ex, you can only have a new and better relationship with a new person.
Their coming back is not a sign of love. Their coming back is a great opportunity for you to shut them down for good. Responding or engaging will be a sign that you are ‘still interested’. The paramount word here is - I.G.N.O.R.E. Do you know what humans find the most annoying and painful? Being ignored. Polls and polls of data indicate that this is the worst (or one of the worst) feeling a human can possibly experience. The good news is that ignoring is easy – it requires zero mental energy or input on one’s part.
Learn what happened, WHY it did not work out, and what needs to be different to make it work next time. If you don’t learn, you run the risk of ending up in the same type of a relationship with the same type of a person.
Life is a beautiful b*tch, it teaches us lessons until we get it. Be it one time or 10 times – it is up to you. Repeated cycles with pathetic outcomes is always an indicator of not learning from the past.
Learn from your past and take a first step towards your better future today – say ‘No’ to your stinky ex!
YOU MAY ALSO LIKE: Articles - When he thinks you are his property and Post - breakup: does he miss me? or if you want to feel good about your current breakup instead of miserable you will love my empowering e-Book When you are DESPERATE FOR HIS LOVE how to leave your bad relationship without feeling like you are going against yourself