What makes you more attractive to another person
When it comes to dating attraction plays a big role in who we initially pick. Sometimes the initial attraction is so strong that we dismiss everything else we observe about the person.
You may argue - “If the feelings are there we will make it work” and I say – “yes and no” because it is the whole package that either makes or breaks the whole deal.
Having said that, it still pays to be as attractive as we can to the other person. Why miss out on the chance?
In my experience these are the things that affect other person’s perception of us and their attraction level . See if you possess any of these. If not, you may want to work on making changes.
Your looks
Does personality matter? Does character matter? Does it matter who you are, where you are in life, and what you do for a living? Yes, yes and yes, but there is a big ‘BUT’ here. None of it will matter initially if your online picture looks terrible or your appearance is just ‘meh’.
Judging someone by their appearance seems so shallow and unfair, but unfortunately this is what drives (for most of us) the desire to agree to that first date. They judge us by our looks and we judge them by their looks. This is how things work, ladies.
I would not waste my time arguing about how stupid and unfair this whole thing is. Instead I would accept that life is not always fair and sometimes we just need to go along with what works.
What will work in your favor is your effort to look your best. Make sure your hair looks nice, teeth are in great shape and brushed, clothes fit nicely (large baggy clothes may look like you are wearing a car cover), nice shoes, no heavy makeup and clean nails. It is really not that difficult, is it?
I once met a man who claimed to be a clean cut professional with a job in senior management and who was dressed up so sloppy that I thought he was a scam. Or maybe some sort of a manipulator who tells women what they wants to hear.
I am perfectly aware that some of us do not care about the dressing up part and having our hair or nails done, however, improving appearance is a must if you want to come across as more attractive to the other person. It is just the way things work.
Positive outlook on life
You will never believe how many potential relationships die because of a lack of positivity. A nasty person complaining about everything or a chronic nagger is someone who is very difficult to be around day in and day out.
We all have some stuff going on in life and of course it is not always good or perfect, but it is not fair to use the other person as our counselor.
Positivity radiates energy and happiness. Everyone I know are attracted to positive people. There is something about their attitude, way of thinking, and optimistic outlook on life that makes everybody around them happier.
It is never a burden to be around a positive person. In fact, we may find that their sunny disposition clears our cloudy days! It is no wonder that because of such positive experiences we unconsciously gravitate towards such people.
You may not be a naturally positive person. If this is the case, then it is OK as long as you are not negative. Stay away from uncomfortable subjects, negative feedback and everything that may paint you as an ‘unhappy, grumpy, gloomy person’.
Don’t you have anything good to say? I do not believe there was nothing good in your life worthy of story-telling. Share those experiences!
One trick that I know of is to smile. Smile - smile - smile and you will come across as a positive person (and more attractive) without saying a word!
Negativity attracts negativity. If we think of ourselves as being ‘less than’, then we will attract people who reinforce that believe. Now, that’s a dangerous situation to be in!
Your sense of security
Security is not just attractive, it is a powerful aphrodisiac! Remember those times when you had to talk to a timid guy online giving him constant reassurance? Or perhaps he was not sure where to go on your first date or what to do? Or, maybe he was anxious about his extra weight, kept talking about it non-stop and worried you may dump him?
How in the world is this attractive???
Being chronically unsure, feeling anxious and seeking constant reassurance, fishing for a positive feedback and other insecurity related behaviors are all major turn offs. They are attraction killers!
I know you may have something uncomfortable going on and stuff (we all do!!), but it pays big time to work on our insecurity issues.
An unattractive but super secure woman will always have better luck with men over an attractive but super insecure and needy woman. That’s the fact of life. Look around and see the living proof.
There is a world of difference between who we pick when we are secure vs. when we are insecure. Looking back at my own relationships I can tell now why I did what I did, what my motivations were and why they ended in a major disaster. The bottom line is that when we are insecure we compromise ourselves big time and settle for less. We think we do not deserve better.
Being secure really pays. People perceive security as a healthy independence. If you are secure the other person will feel comfortable and happy in your presence. No one wants a relationship that feels like an obligation or a burden where one party constantly plays the role of a counselor, a caring parent, an entertainer or a psychiatrist.
YOU MAY ALSO LIKE: Articles - Attraction killers for men and Parent- Child relationships or if you feel like you need to talk to someone because your situation is too unique and most of the stuff you read on the internet is too generic and not helpful, then I would personally like to recommend you this super affordable online counseling service.