Stay away from men who make you feel INSECURE
Have you ever noticed how differently we may feel with different men? Here is this man who spills jokes right and left and suddenly you laugh like never before, feel special, happy, and confident. Here is another guy who is always way too serious, super-pragmatic, practical, and rigid. Try laughing in front of him (like never before) and watch his reaction. You will sure be
perceived as a shallow or an 'air headed' woman. See, since he is too serious, he does not remember the last time he laughed therefore, someone laughing over a simple thing does not make any sense to him. To him being serious is being reasonable, and to you - being uptight and feeling stiff.
Or think of a guy who is incredibly open about his feelings and intentions - he will surely make you feel very comfortable about sharing your own feelings for him in return. Try to speak openly about your feelings to a guy who is on the fence about your entire relationship with him - he will think of you as an emotional and unstable psycho.
Some men may make you feel unworthy and some will treat you as a princess, even though you may do nothing to deserve 'the status'. But there is yet another category of men to be aware of - the kind of men who ei-ther through their communication style or behavioral pattern will make you feel INSECURE.
Like in the presented examples above this type of a man will be a master at triggering another kind of a feeling - and this feeling is called 'insecurity'. And where there is insecurity, there is also anxiety, neediness and feelings of being unloved and rejected as well. Feeling insecure is bad enough, but experiencing anxieties on a top of this can be quite unbearable! This is one example of a miserable relationship you do not want to be in!
Now, it is OK to feel insecure in a relationships from time to time, but if insecurity and feeling unloved is ALL YOU FEEL then it is a clear sign that your are NOT COMPATIBLE AND HE IS THE WRONG MAN FOR YOU! If you were to have a friend, or even a toxic relative, who put you through a constant state of anxiety and stress, you would not want to have any dealings with them, right? Then why are you staying in an unhappy relationship with an incompatible man?
These are the most probable reasons:
When you are desperate for attention and love, 10% of occasional 'love' and 'attention' crumbs given to you, in your opinion, are still better then nothing (even if you feel unloved and ignored 90% of the time in a given relationship). If you feel desperate then you will absolutely love my empowering eBook 'When you are DESPERATE FOR HIS LOVE; how to leave your bad relationship without feeling like you are going against yourself'.
Refusing to recognize that people do not change and what you see is what you get. If he has been giving only 10 % of his love this is what you will be receiving on a regular basis.
You cannot make him love you more or to give you more. His style of loving is incompatible with yours! Asking of him to give more will make you look like 'a desperate, needy, demanding woman' in his eyes. Meanwhile, you will be thinking that he is just 'too cold' and therefore should be giving more. You are not demanding and he is not cold - you are simply incompatible!
A desperate attempt on your part to prove your own worth. You are so insecure and desperate, you use the man as a tool to validate your own self worth. A relationship with him is like an addictive validation cycle - you are expecting and demanding more and more of his attention and want to feel better about yourself. This is not a relationship, it is called 'co-dependency'.
The only way to get away from him is to adopt an attitude that this man is a substance that is wrong for your health and well-being. Recognize that you have insecurity and self esteem issues. An emotionally healthy woman will not put herself through such torture and discomfort. The minute she sees him for who he is and the minute she feels like she has to sacrifice too much of her personality (or even worse - deny her own self) to be with him she will be out of there!
You are attracted to a certain type
You are attracted to a certain type of a man who triggers certain types of feelings (insecurity, anxiety) and somehow you equate these feelings with love and being loved. This perception is certainly wrong.
If you think that meeting 'wrong' men is your fate, you are destined to have relationships with only 'wrong' men, and you mistakenly think that only lucky women have the most loving and caring boyfriends.
YOU ARE WRONG AND HERE IS WHY: every woman meets wrong guys for her but not every woman will STAY with them. In other words, the only difference between the 'lucky in
love' women and the 'unlucky' ones is that the 'lucky' ones recognize wrong men for them and drop them like a hot rock, meanwhile the 'unlucky' ones, due to some internal emotional issues, decide to stay. This is so simple yet so complicated for some!
I say ladies, adjust your radar and learn to recognize wrong men for you - pay attention to how he treats you and how he makes you feel. Feeling constantly insecure or like you are walking on eggshells are warning signs of a bad relationship for you. You are the boss of your personal life and free to leave at any time! After all, you can be either a 'lucky in love' woman who knows when to leave or an 'unlucky' one, who stays no matter what. YOUR CHOICE!
YOU MAY ALSO LIKE THIS BOOK: (UK - click here) If This Is Love, Why Do I Feel So Insecure?: Learn How to Deal With Anxiety, Jealousy, and Depression in Romance--and Get the Love You Deserve!