Here is what he does when he doesn’t have the guts to break up with you
Let us admit that most people do not know how to break up and those who do – still won’t stick with the ‘rules’. Why? Because no one wants to deal with the emotional reaction of the other party.
Have you EVER tried to break up with a guy? How did it go? I bet 99.99% of the time it did not go very well.
I do not know about you, but I have been a witness of quite ugly breakup stories. Most men do not take ‘the news’ very well. Many of them become angry, act irrational, resort to name-calling and self-destructing behavior, act manipulative or beg for another chance. This is just a short list, but you get the idea.
Now, let us reverse the tables and pretend it is not you but HIM who wants to break up. What would you like him to say (or do) to soften the blow? Is there even such a thing as a ‘pleasant breakup’??
Of course he will choose the easy way out. Why deal with your tears, a million ‘why?’, begging for another chance or your demands to be explained? Most some men just choose not to deal with it. Not trying to justify their behavior here, just stating the facts.
They do not want to see your face, they do not want to hear your
pleadings, they do not want to see your full of tears eyes, and they do not want you to change their mind. They do not want to look like a JERK who hurts a woman who did nothing to deserve it. So they choose the easiest (in their opinion) way out… which only confirms that yes, they are a JERK indeed!
The only difference this time is they won’t have to face anything. It is a cowardly way out I would say, but it is what it is.
Listed below are behaviors of men who want to leave a relationship but don't have the guts to end it officially. If the listed below is something that he has never done before, then it means YOU COULD BE IN THE MIDDLE OF A BREAKUP WITHOUT REALIZING IT.
He switches to a fading out mode. Just like the Moon that goes through its phases and eventually disappears from the sky, he turns into a fading mode and eventually disappears from your horizon forever. If he is in this mode, then it will be just a matter of time before your Mr. Boyfriend turns into a Mr. Invisible.
I have to admit, it is a very painful experience to go through. Your time together, his attention, daily conversations, and other activities – all of this will gradually start disappearing, one by one, week by week, month by month, until nothing is left. It will be one of those moments when one day you wake up in the morning wondering “Where did it all go? Am I still in a relationship??”
If you are a loyal and a nice person you may decide to wait hoping for the things to change. 'After all - you reason - he has been very busy at work, I can wait it out'. You wait and wait, and then you wait some more. Since there was no official ending and he has been always nice, you want to believe you are still in a relationship.
You spend most of your days alone but do not feel comfortable dating other people. You still believe you have a boyfriend.
If you become a victim of fading out it may take months to FINALLY REALIZE what happened. It may take months to come to terms that the relationship is over. You may never obtain a sense of complete closure, but moving on in this situation is a definite must.
The famous disappearing act. ‘Help, my boyfriend has been missing for two weeks! What should I do?’, ‘One day we were perfect together and the next – we were not'.
Many men do this. By disappearing, they hope you will disappear too. By disappearing, they hope you will ‘get the message’ and peacefully move on with your life.
They are gone because they want YOU to be gone, and they won’t talk because they have nothing good to say.
Just like that airplane or train that you missed to board, they are gone far enough to make themselves invisible.
He is gone and he feels comfortable. WITHOUT YOU.
Your attempts to contact him will be seen as an unwanted intrusion into the precious paradise of his. He may or may not respond, but the bottom line is that it is over.
He starts dating someone else. Yep, some men leave unsatisfying relationships by starting a new one with another woman. You may still believe you have a boyfriend, but if he started dating someone else it means you became his ‘ex’. You just do not know about it YET. To you – he is ‘just cheating’, to him – you are his ‘ex’.
Some men have a very tough time being alone. They do not know what it’s like to be alone, and their entire dating life consists of a string of multiple unfinished and new relationships intertwined with each other. They hope from one woman to another, they say the same things to each of them, and their relationships end in the exactly the same manner as the previous ones ended. It is always the same… I call it a pattern.
Do you remember how your relationship started? If he was in a relationship with someone else at that time, then you have your answer. He did it to her and now he is doing exactly the same thing to you.
He starts acting like a complete Jerk. He becomes rude and disrespectful, ‘forgets’ your birthdays, stops treating you special on Valentine’s Days, spends too much time with his friends, pick fights and does all the other things to make you angry enough to break things off.
When it comes to pushing your pain buttons - he becomes especially creative. Let’s say you never liked him doing A, B, and C. When your relationship was new and he tried his best to be a good boyfriend he would not think twice to upset or hurt you by doing those things. Now, since he couldn't care less, he may very well resort to doing those exact things - A,B, and C.
He wants you to be mad and frustrated enough to call it quits. He does not want to take the responsibility for ending things. He wants YOU to do it. And he will keep provoking you more and more until you explode and end it.
He becomes unavailable to meet unless it is about sex. Attention – Mr. User alert! Although he does not need the relationship anymore, he will not mind milking the situation. If you are into him (and I am sure you are) you may go along with this scenario for a while hoping it is of a temporary nature.
With passing weeks and months you will gradually come to the realization that everything you had in the beginning is permanently gone and you became nothing but a casual booty call to him.
It is also worth noting that a man’s style of ending relationships depends on his personality type and his overall attitude towards a woman.
In my experience, every man has his own unique, but steady pattern of ending things. In other words, each man ends all of his relationships in the same or in a very similar manner. A helpful hint: if possible, find out who his ex-girlfriend was and how it all ended. Based on what she says you may discover a stunning similarity.
YOU MAY ALSO LIKE: my very popular article Be done with your dead-end relationship! or this e-Course His Secret Obsession (how to make him addicted to you!)